Wednesday, January 28, 2009

One year of Life

From you I learnt to live,
From you I lived.
From you I learnt to vent,
Each time I felt all miffed.

From you I learnt to laugh,
At the sad bits of my life,
You were the one who taught me,
To sail through my strife.

You taught me to find,
Joy, passion and happiness.
I learnt to write out
My sorrows and my loneliness.

I wonder what I was,
When you weren’t there,
I wonder who I was,
When you weren’t there…

I begin from you,
And end, at you.
You mean life to me,
Without you, there isn’t me.

One year of life,
Today I celebrate,
My life came to life,
Last year, this very day…
[It feels so victorious, really. :D I am genuinely happy, after a very long time. Will be back with a proper 'article'. No series. Just typically ME. :D]

Thursday, January 22, 2009

The Other Woman - III

[ Alright. This is the last one, for now. Yet again, for those who haven't read parts 1 and 2, they aren't linked. Or rather, they are linked too deeply. So you can read it. :) ]

She loves me. She loves me not. She loves me…
The last petal fell from my hand before I could continue playing this stupid game.
She loves me. That’s where it stopped.
I kicked a nearby bottle in anger.
It was so weird.
My house reminded me of her.
My girlfriend reminded me of her.
Childhood reminded me of her.
Being online, reminded me of her.
Everything, reminded me of her.
As if she was walking beside me all through.
I recalled the last time I ever spoke to her. Ages ago.
She had sent me a patch up mail.
I’d agreed, but wasn’t ever able to do it. I couldn’t patch up.
Those eyes. Her.
They were the most difficult things in my life.
She was the most difficult part of my life.
I remember how my girlfriend had fought with her, for me. I didn’t know what to do.
My heart went out for both of them.
Yet I was being forced to choose one.
Or rather, I wasn’t being given a choice at all.

Everything changed after that.
Her silence accused me of betrayal. Betrayal I couldn’t face.
We stopped talking.
But she never went out of my mind. Not for a second.
I wondered why, as I switched off my room’s light.
My phone beeped.
‘Hey! Good night!’ it said. My girlfriend.
I stared at the phone.
And for the fifteenth time that night, I switched on the light, went to my balcony and plucked another rose. Red rose. That one’s for love, they say…
And I sat down.
‘I love her, I love her not. I love her, I love her not…’
Fifteen minutes later, it stopped at ‘I love her not’.
I smirked, and then laughed helplessly.
I did it for my girlfriend.
I thought about doing the same for her.
But I stopped. I didn’t want to know.
And this stupid game was turning out to be too truthful, anyway.
I went back to my bed and closed my eyes.
Ignorance is bliss.

[Once again, if you find resemblances, they are intended. Else, they arent. Ciao.]

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The Other Woman - II

[ You can read it, even if you haven't read the first part. Just, if you have, you'll understand better. And, both are from different perspectives.]

My eyes never really had to be forced to do this. They automatically found their way. To her. And although I often pretended to look away, and act oblivious to her presence, my eyes darted around for her face, every damn day.
I saw her from the corner of my eye.
She was sitting there, all by herself, licking an ice cream.
She had a bloodshot, painful look in her eyes. And she was looking at ME. Staring, rather.
Carmel feast.
As my friends pranced around me, and played some stupid game with their ice creams, my mind wondered why she sat there alone. Her friends? She had few, but they were gems.
She still continued to stare, as I looked everywhere else except toward her.
Those eyes. I couldn’t look at them. They made me feel guilty. Of something.
I laughed, faking it, lest someone saw through my eyes.
She sighed, and I felt relieved that she hadn’t seen through it.
I still remember.
Oh god. Did I do wrong?
Her weeping face crossed my eyes, and those words rang in my mind.
“If you think that you can take him away, just forget about it!” I had said those.
But I’m not guilty of that.
He was mine. He still is. Yeah.
She, how was I to know whether it was love?
And could it be love?
They were so different.
And they didn’t even know each other.
But that look in her eye. It answered all my questions.
It was anger. It was passion. It was hatred. It was love.
Love for him.
Love with him.
Love for someone, who was mine.

I saw her throw her ice cream and walk away.
My heart skipped a beat, as my ice cream fell from my hand.
Wrong. Right. Wrong. Right.

I turned away, and laughed boisterously. I was glad my friends were around. To hide.
And I tried to lose myself in that noise.
Noise, that kept me miles away from that deadening silence of hers.
Silence, that told me harsh reality.
Silence, that shouted of love.
Love, I couldn’t understand.
Love, I didn’t want to understand.

He was mine.

[Simple funda: If you find resemblances, then they are intended. If you don't, they aren't. And guys, I love writing this series. It's rather close to my heart. Please tell me I can continue!]